old: the "sur"render of a lifetime

I know I was filled with anticipation for Surrender Saturday. And usually, anytime something looks as promising as this one did on paper, it never lives up to the hype. But every once in a while, the game outlives the hype. Its better than advertised. Saturday was one of those magical, beeee-yutiful days that will never be lived down. I'm still high as a kite over this win. (At least, I assume its the win that has me high ...)

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"We will not surrender the Big XII to Oklahoma and Texas" -- former Nebraska AD Steve Pederson, defending his retarded, ludacris, absolutely jaw-dropping-idiotic decision to fire Frank Solich four years ago.

"I refuse to allow this program to gravitiate towards mediocrity" -- Pederson at same news conference after breaking his promise to Dr. Tom and Husker Nation and firing Solich coming off a 10-3 season.

"76-39" -- scoreboard at Memorial Stadium Saturday, indicating the final score of Kansas' victory over Nebraska.

Surrender to Oklahoma? Surrender to Texas? Surrender to mediocrity?

Surrender to Kansas!

On a beautiful, crisp, sun filled Saturday afternoon in early November, "Sur" (as in "surrender") William Callahan and his Huskers were de-pants, flogged like a government mule, and humiliated in a manner the likes of which not even this overly optimistic Hawk backer could have anticipated. (I predicted we'd only score 61).

76! We dropped 76 on Nebraska! NOBODY had EVER dropped that much on Nebraska before! We scored a touchdown on 10 consecutive possessions! How in the hell does that happen? 10 consecutive times Kansas was handed the football, 10 consecutive times we crossed the goalline!

November 3, 2007. A day that will live in infamy for Nebraska.

A day that someday, when I'm 85 and my kids have dumped me in the home to rot away the rest of my existance, I will think about, and smile.

And recap to anyone who'll listen ...

* proof that this was a game for the ages: there was no parking anywhere to be had on the streets of Lawrence. We drove around for nearly an hour, and found nothing, before finally I dropped the "f*ck it, we're paying" line. I have never paid to park at a Jayhawks football game before.

* and parking rose from $20 to $30 in the hour we were looking. All of Jayhawk Nation showed up to witness the Surrender of the Century. And Surrender away young William Callahan's Huskers did.

* Gregg noted that the scene was "like IMS on Sunday morning" and I had to agree. People parking on lawns, grills going everywhere, everyone picking a side and wearing their colors with pride, it was beautiful. The only thing missing to complete Lawrence turning into Speedway, Indiana was me shirtless and puking on the side of the street from one too many shots of Captain. That, and Jim Nabors. But still, just incredible to witness.

* somehow, we scored face value tickets. $75. Historic for two reasons: (a) other than during the ill-fated years of owning season tickets to Jayhawk Football, I don't believe I have ever paid anything close to face value for a Jayhawks football game ... and (b) I paid less than $1 per point to witness the Surrender of the Century. Let that one kick in. I paid less than a buck a point! (student section chant voice) Worse than Baylor! Worse than Baylor!

* we entered the stadium, as usual, about 75 minutes before kickoff ... and the student section was already filled up in the lower bowl. I have never sat that high up for a Jayhawks football game (row 35).

* there were very, very few Husker fans there to witness this historic Surrender of the Big XII North by their team. There were maybe 5,000 Nebraska fans in attendance. I have never seen so few fans of the Big Red at a football game. And the ones who were there, didn't believe their team could win. This is what you've sunk to guys: your fan base expects to lose in football. To Kansas.

* one of the best lines of the day, courtesy Gregg: "You can't say the Sur William Callahan era isn't historic". Also, courtesy Gregg, "I'm thinking of two words that begin with a p ..." Pride and Poise! Pride and Poise!

* new (at least to me) Hawk Football t-shirts spotted on Saturday:

Hawk Football: The reason its so windy in Lawrence is because KSU sucks and MU blows!
Hawk Football: Nebraska, So Many Choices! (above pictures of a goat, sister, and chicken)
Hawk Football: Missouri is my b*tch!

* the guy sitting behind us expressed abject embarrassment that all he brought was a flask. Hawk Football: You Can't Drink All Day Unless You Start in the Morning!

* Hawk Football: Rock Out With Your Hawk Out! That's one's always been my favorite. That, or Hawk Football: Win or Lose, We'll Still Booze!

* I still hate Sunflower Song. Its retarded. Go away Sunflower Song. Mix Africano or Jazzy Jayhawk into the pregame routine instead.

* if there's any sweeter sight than 50,000 plus swaying on the seats, arms locked around each other, singing the Alma Mater, well, I don't know what it is. Lift the Chorus Ever Onward, Crimson and the Blue! (woo!) Hail to Thee Our Alma Mater, Hail to Old KU!

* I have long been on record in my opposition to fly overs. I think they are the biggest waste of taxpayer money known to man, and maybe if instead of flying over football fields, they were flying over the terrorists and bombing the living hell out of them, we might be winning this war. Call me crazy. But, but -- after Saturday, I will at least concede they can be cool. You could hear the planes approaching the entire time during the Anthem, couldn't see them yet but could hear them, and then bam, there they are at the end. Even I didn't boo them for once. Either I'm softening up, or maybe I was wr ... wr ... wr ... incorrect on my position on flyovers.

* Priceless Student Section Moment Number One: booing the parachuting guy because his chute was KSU colors. Awesome.

* The KU student section is known for many things. Alcohol. Booze. Drunken Debauchery. And oh yeah, a priceless chant involving the f bomb that certain moral kooks wants banned. Saturday, we got to drop said chant 12 times! KU kicked off 12 f*cking times! (ku student section voice) Aaaah! Rip his f*cking head off!

* Another great chant Saturday: (student section voice) Bill, you're fired! Bill, you're fired!

* (ku student section voice) you let the whole state down! you let the whole state down! That one never gets old.

* KU went 3 and out on its first possession. We then scored a touchdown on 11 out of our next 12 times we had the ball, the only exception being a missed field goal. Call me crazy, but when you score a touchdown 11 times in a game, you're facing a really poorly coached team.

* awesome article that pretty much accurately details how low Nebraska football has sunk: http://www.journalstar.com/articles/2007/11/04/huskerextra/football/doc472d475b5c8d4619560608.txt

* Reesing for Heisman! 30 of 41, 6 touchdowns, 354 yards. Against Nebraska.

* Its getting ugly in Lincoln. And the best part is, Sur William still doesn't get it. http://64.131.67.10/vbbs/showthread.php?t=45946

* seriously, www.billmustgo.com Its time, Sur William, to show some integrity and resign. For the sake of a once proud, historic, model program that you have, in four short years, turned into the Oakland Raiders of Division 1 football. Its time, Sur William, to fall on your own sword for the unforgivable and inconceivable sin of giving up 76 points to the freaking Jayhawks. And its time, Sur William, to resign simply to save yourself the embarrassment of an inconceivable sight: a not-quite-filled up Memorial Stadium on Saturday, when Kansas State arrives to witness your troops wave the white flag and desecrate the hallowed grounds of Tom Osborne Field with yet another gutless, pathetic, ill-coached effort. Resign, Sur William. Resign.

* any article that calls Nebraska a "homecoming cupcake", gets mention: http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/sports/stories.nsf/mizzou/story/C5A29C7A94BB2AC886257389004EC824?OpenDocument

* seriously. Nebraska a "homecoming cupcake". Jesus, this is incredible. They're the worst team in the Big XII North. They're in dead last. They're mathematically eliminated from conference championship consideration with 3 weeks left in the season!!! Tigers fans, Jayhawks fans, rejoice! I come not to pity the Huskers, but to dump on them mercilessly! Bill you're fired! Worse than Baylor!

* Sur William Callahan is now 0-3 at Arrowhead, 0-2 in Columbia, and 0-2 in Lawrence. I'm guessing he'll never get a chance to coach at any of those places again. Unless one of the directional state schools we load up our non-con with hires him.

* Good to see that Nebraska "refused to let this program gravitate towards mediocrity", and just opted to jump face first into the sh*tter instead.

* Sur William had the look, the demeanor, the characteristics of a guy who just doesn't give a sh*t anymore. I was focused on watching him most of the game, just because I wanted to see how he'd react. He had no emotion, other than a couple times he looked ready to physically strangle Cosgrove and / or his Pink Shirt defenders. He looked like a guy who knows he's getting fired in three weeks (or sooner) and is walking away with a multi million dollar buyout.

* in case you can't tell, I freaking love what Nebraska football has become. Eight weeks ago, Nebraska was ranked #11, had #1 USC in Lincoln, and was leading them 10-7 after a quarter. Eight weeks ago, Nebraska was a legitimate, bona fide national championship contender. Eight weeks later, they've given up 40 plus 5 out of 8 games, have lost 6 out of 8 games, have lost 3 straight at home, are 1-5 in the conference, and just had the Spirit of 76 dropped on them. By perennial doormat Kansas.

* Priceless Student Section Moment Number 2: when the ref announced "timeout, Kansas State", and the place erupted in a chorus of boos and death threats towards said official. A solid minute of booing, chanting, and threats. I freaking love the student section.

* Nobody left early. At Kansas, we're known for something affectionately called the "Third Quarter Shuffle", because KU football is usually so god awful that everyone leaves during the 3rd quarter to avoid having to watch a full on blowout. Saturday was a full on blowout. And nobody left early. Everyone wanted to witness every last second of what might be (and should be) the final stop of the Sur William Callahan Farewell Tour.

* and nobody rushed the field. Nobody stormed the field, nobody had to be told to not rush the field. I trust the same was true in Columbia a month ago. Because Nebraska is no longer a huge victory, a proud victory, they're a "homecoming cupcake". Jesus, this is awesome. This is just freaking awesome. (ku student section voice) f*ck Nebraska! f*ck Nebraska!

* did you ever, and I know we have both KU and MU fans reading this, but come on guys, be objective here for one second. Did anyone actually ever dream we'd live to see the day when KU vs MU would not only determine the Big XII North (they are the only two teams mathematically alive to win the division) ... but it might also determine who plays for the national championship? KU and MU both freaking national championship contenders? In something other than basketball?!?! Good freaking God, rip my f*cking head off! The world has gone completely insane! (steve looking to the sky in anticipation of immediate second coming of Jesus ...)

* 19 days until the Tailgate of the Century. I know I've been on the fence about going to this game, but after the historic, unprecedented, "woo!" surrender I witnessed on Saturday, screw it, I'm in. Let's start planning now. We can argue, whine, and taunt each other during and after the game, but dammit, Tailgate of the Century beforehand. Because we might disagree on who we cheer for, and might be wearing differing colors, and Heath and Phil might come to blows arguing about which QB deserves the Heisman, Reesing or Daniel ... but how can you not unite and rejoice at how low Husker football has sunk? They're the urinal of the Big XII! They're the doormat! They're the ones coached by Terry Allen, Bob Stull, or Ron Prince! (Hawk Football: "Don't Forget Your Power Towels!!!" -- Ron Prince) They're the p*ss poorly run program that has no shot to win anytime they take the field! They're us from 5 years ago! And choose who "us" is, KU or MU! They're horrible!

* Again, in case you can't tell, Surrender Saturday was something that ... well, it was really special. If only KU and MU were playing in September, when it would be nice, warm, and sunny out, instead of the cold of late November (hence my being on the fence about going. I freaking hate cold weather. Any day under 80, is too freaking cold). But, a season like this happens once in a lifetime. The least we can do to celebrate this joyous occasion is booze it up all day, and watch which mascot head Corso picks.

* another great article on despondent Husker faithful: http://www2.kusports.com/news/2007/nov/04/fans_plea_help_us/?football I love the last line the best, "we can still make a bowl". This is what Nebraska football has been reduced to, having to win out just to maybe go to Shreveport for the Independence Bowl. God, this is awesome. I mean, this is just freaking awesome. And the best part is, even if they win out, would Shreveport take this team? Is Nebraska even good enough to play in the Independence Bowl?

* Nebraska and "needing to win out just to maybe, possibly, get an invite to the Independence Bowl" in the same sentence. Hee hee hee.

* I still have the goofy, sh*t eating grin on my face that's been there since Saturday morning. And not even yesterday's collapse at Arrowhead could erase it. 76 points. 76 freaking points. On Nebraska! And if Webb doesn't miss two kicks (field goal, extra point), we'd have dropped 80 on them!

* And yes, for the record, I absolutely would have gone for the 2 point conversion when we ran the score to 48-21 right before the half. You absolutely show no class, decorum, or respect in that spot and go for the "eff you 2". Especially to a team that has run up the score at least 15 times on us in my lifetime alone.

* In the 1980s, Kansas went 0-10 against Nebraska ... and scored 67 total points against them. In the decade. Saturday, we had 69 with over 20 minutes of football left to play. I mean, I literally spent the entire second half just laughing, smiling, just taking it all in. As Kansas fans, we have waited 30 f*cking years for this.

* So if you're Dr. Tom, how long do you wait to sh*t can Sur William? Today? Tomorrow? Tonight? I mean, he has to go. There is no way he has even an ounce of credibility left with that team after the latest surrender of the Huskers to inferior competition talent-wise. If you were a player on Nebraska, could you even listen to Sur William at this point? Everyone knows he's hitting the curb, at the latest, a day after the season is over.

* in the two games against the Big XII North contenders this year, Sur William's Huskers have been outscored 117-45. Wow. I'm not sure the 1995 Huskers even gave up 117 points in the season.

* Saturday was the 5th time this year Nebraska gave up over 40 points in a game (USC, Ball State, Oklahoma State, MU, KU). They also have given up 36 points to A&M, and completely collapsed against UT, turning a 17-3 lead into a 28-25 defeat by allowing 22 4th quarter points. I'd say they have some defensive issues, but why pile on.

* and that's the thing. If you'd told me coming into the game that Nebraska would pretty much move the ball at will, run up nearly 500 yards of offense, and score 39, I'd have said we were losing. How the mighty have fallen. (gregg voice) Bob Devaney's doing a lot of 360s in the coffin today!

* everyone (including me) thought Jack Harry was certifiably nuts when he predicted KU to go 10-2 and win the North. The crazy thing about Jack now ... is that he undersold us.

* I can only imagine how long and glorious the party lasted in Lawrence Saturday night. If the walk back to the car is any indication, I'm guessing some folks were treated for alcohol poisoning, and that there's gonna be a lot of little baby Jayhawks born about 10 months from now. Ain't we lucky we got 'em, good times!

* A couple inspirational thoughts to tide you over until next time:

Its donkeys week!
What's your favorite brand of fuel? Sonoco ... or 76?
Its donkeys week!
What year was the Declaration of Independence signed? 17 seventy ... 6?
Its donkeys week!
What's the name of the NBA team in Philadelphia? The ... 76ers?
And oh yeah. Its donkeys week! Chiefs! broncos! First place on the line!